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Thread: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

  1. #1
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    Talking 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman



    Got them from a list off IMDB boards. Thought of them are really funny, so if you have more ideas, please do share!

    #12 is by the funniest thing ever.


    1. Batman uses his growling voice to hide his identity, not to mention it sounds more menacing.
    2. Batman doesn't need superpowers, making him more powerful and nothing to fail on him.
    3. Peter Parker is a dork who works as a pizza delivery guy while Bruce Wayne is a billionaire playboy
    4. Batman has all the woman and money he ever needs
    5. Bruce Wayne is a pimp and Peter Parker's been crying about the same girl for 35 years.
    6. Batman relies on "his own scientific knowledge, detective skills, and athletic prowess.
    7. Batman has a butler.
    8. Batman won't go through an "emo phase".
    9. When Batman goes through an emo phase, he cries man tears because the love of his life was blown up by his sworn enemy, whereas spiderman gets a gay chirguh haircut and dances like olivia newton john
    10. Batman doesn't lose his powers or abilities because he doubts himself... Alfred just kicks his ass back into shape...
    11. Batman doesn't live with his Aunt.
    12. Batman doesn't have a best friend who becomes his enemy who becomes his friend who becomes his enemy who becomes suspected girlfriend's boyfriend who becomes his ally who helps him save the day because he is too weak to do it himself who becomes his dead friend
    13. Batman does not need super-powered friends to take out his enemies... he's a one-man wrecking crew using other people as pawns
    14. Batman's costume is way cooler.
    15. Batman is like a bat that isn't blind or bound to caves. Spiderman is like a spider without posionous venom, 8 legs or the ability to inspire children's books my making messages in webs.
    16. Batman has his own pizza, which spiderman has 30 minutes to deliver or he will get fired
    17. Batman doesn't test his powers by waving his wrist and saying "go web go".
    18. Batman doesn't get crowd-surfed by a random group of passengers on a train.
    19. Very few of Batman's villains are closely tied to Bruce Wayne's life. Therefore, there are fewer opportunities for stupid coincidences and lazy contrivances, like Eddie Brock happening upon the same church in which Spidey is shedding his black suit.
    20. Batman traveled the world to understand the criminal mind, while Parker can't get out of the dump he's in.




    What else?

  2. #2
    You got a purdy mouth... Southbound's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    On the flip side, Spiderman doesn't have to answer embarrassing questions about his past relationship with an impressionable teenage boy. "Boy Wonder" indeed

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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by Serg!o
    8. Batman won't go through an "emo phase".
    9. When Batman goes through an emo phase, he cries man tears because the love of his life was blown up by his sworn enemy, whereas spiderman gets a gay chirguh haircut and dances like olivia newton john
    I can't trust this list.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Iron Man and Batman:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlLeCu63HCA&NR=1

    Featuring several great lines such as:

    "I'm Iron Man." "I'm Batman." "I'm a Marvel." "I'm Batman." *pause*

    "I like the night life." "I AM the night life." "I give people the impression I'm a jerk." "I give people panic attacks."

    "I don't come with childhood trauma." "I don't have herpes."



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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by KJip James
    Iron Man and Batman:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlLeCu63HCA&NR=1

    Featuring several great lines such as:

    "I'm Iron Man." "I'm Batman." "I'm a Marvel." "I'm Batman." *pause*

    "I like the night life." "I AM the night life." "I give people the impression I'm a jerk." "I give people panic attacks."

    "I don't come with childhood trauma." "I don't have herpes."

    lmao Yeah i love that one.

    They are all pretty good tbh.
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    Nanu Nanu RagnarokMike's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by KJip James
    Iron Man and Batman:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlLeCu63HCA&NR=1

    Featuring several great lines such as:

    "I'm Iron Man." "I'm Batman." "I'm a Marvel." "I'm Batman." *pause*

    "I like the night life." "I AM the night life." "I give people the impression I'm a jerk." "I give people panic attacks."

    "I don't come with childhood trauma." "I don't have herpes."

    "Hi, I'm a Marvel"

    "And I'm the Joker"

    "Well, can't argue with that logic...see you later."


    Quote Originally Posted by Black Dynamite
    Sometimes a terrible idea is the best idea you got, and one thing I've learned, is always go with the best idea you got.

  8. #8
    mikefp517
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    16. Batman has his own pizza, which spiderman has 30 minutes to deliver or he will get fired


    Priceless! i bet his tip is more than parker makes all month !

  9. #9
    Illmatic
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman doesn't have a vagina.

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    Shit Just Got Real... Bullet's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Spiderman dosen't live with a teenage boy. A teenage boy who wears a suggestive costume and frequently slides down a pole.

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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman doesn't have to work for a living. Spiderman is always complaining about his glamourous job as a photographer *gasp* He is always moaning about he should get paid more and when someone else comes and steals the show, he cries. Aren't you spiderman? superhuman strengh and all that? A pussy...

  12. #12
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    To be fair Batman vs Iron Man is a fairer comparison.


    Quote Originally Posted by Bullet
    Spiderman dosen't live with a teenage boy. A teenage boy who wears a suggestive costume and frequently slides down a pole.
    Spiderman probably would have people stay at his house too... if he owned one rather than live with his aunt.
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman has a higher IQ, he uses his detective skills to solve crimes. Spiderman has a stupid "Spidey Sense" The spidey sense senses criminals but can't sense him to be a man and get his own place to stay. fag...

  14. #14
    The Devil's Eyes BigRed's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    For the record (on a serious note), I've always felt Spiderman was overrated. The first was very, very enjoyable. But the last two really had no right (especially the third) making as much money as they did considering they were very underwhelming IMO.

  15. #15
    Don't Be Relevant Ness's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    It's hard to find your own place when you have no MONEY...

    But he doesn't live with Aunt May anyways, so...


    Forever.

  16. #16
    Tha SmarkStoppa
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    I can do and Iron Man/Batman comparison.

    "The actor playing Batman beats his mother and sister, whereas the actor playing Iron Man just does a lot of blow."

  17. #17
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by Tha SmarkStoppa
    I can do and Iron Man/Batman comparison.

    "The actor playing Batman beats his mother and sister, whereas the actor playing Iron Man just does a lot of blow."
    Hes been accused of it... not found guilty of it.
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by Tha SmarkStoppa
    I can do and Iron Man/Batman comparison.

    "The actor playing Batman beats his mother and sister, whereas the actor playing Iron Man just does a lot of blow."
    Lame

  19. #19

    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by Tha SmarkStoppa
    I can do and Iron Man/Batman comparison.

    "The actor playing Batman beats his mother and sister, whereas the actor playing Iron Man just does a lot of blow."
    You could have at least done a "came to blows/does blow" joke.

  20. #20
    Nanu Nanu RagnarokMike's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman has the Bat-pod, Spider-Man has a moped.

    Quote Originally Posted by Black Dynamite
    Sometimes a terrible idea is the best idea you got, and one thing I've learned, is always go with the best idea you got.

  21. #21
    $9.99 Jason's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by KJip James
    Iron Man and Batman:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlLeCu63HCA&NR=1

    Featuring several great lines such as:

    "I'm Iron Man." "I'm Batman." "I'm a Marvel." "I'm Batman." *pause*

    "I like the night life." "I AM the night life." "I give people the impression I'm a jerk." "I give people panic attacks."

    "I don't come with childhood trauma." "I don't have herpes."

    I just watched all of those and they were hilarious.

    I loved the one with Hulk and Batman.

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  22. #22
    Nanu Nanu RagnarokMike's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Quote Originally Posted by Jason
    I just watched all of those and they were hilarious.

    I loved the one with Hulk and Batman.

    I'm a Marvel...I'm a DC..and I'm Hellboy was one of my favorites.


    Hellboy: "I like cats"

    Batman: "So do I"

    Hellboy: "Is that why you have meow mix in your pocket"

    Batman: "That's personal"

    Quote Originally Posted by Black Dynamite
    Sometimes a terrible idea is the best idea you got, and one thing I've learned, is always go with the best idea you got.

  23. #23
    Corpus Christy Captain Obvious's Avatar
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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    I loveing this too...but it funny that in this universe...batman and spider-man are BFF

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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman has a bat signal, Spiderman has flashbacks.

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    Default Re: 20 Reasons why Batman is better than Spiderman

    Batman: JERK!!
    Iron Man :EMO!!



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